Five Ways to NOT Tell Someone You Like Them
by Fluffy Bunnies Are So Cute
Summary: BEFORE YOU READ THIS: This is NOT Fissa. EW. The horror. It is a fanfic to make fun of Lissa, 'kay? The title is self explanatory, and there is mentions of Fax. Enjoy! Hope it makes you laugh from Lissa's stupidity XD AU, AH! ONE-SHOT!


_**Five Ways to NOT Tell Someone You Like Them:**_

* * *

_**Step One: **__Do NOT tell them in person_

**1 New Message From: ****_Lissa_**

Haii Fang ;)

**To:****_ Lissa_**

Yo

**1 New Message From: ****_Lissa_**

What's up? *twirls hair around finger*

**To: ****_Lissa_**

Nothing

**1 New Message From: ****_Lissa_**

So ummm Fang!

**To: ****_Lissa_**

What

**1 New Message From: ****_Lissa_**

Will you go out with me?

**2 New Messages From: ****_Lissa_**

Fang?

**3 New Messages From: ****_Lissa_**

FANGG!

**To: ****_Lissa_**

No

* * *

_**Step Two: **__When you start to talk, make sure you ARE arguing_

"Hey, Fang!" I shouted across the hall.

"Don't do that," Fang muttered, shoving past me.

"Do what? I didn't do anything wrong!" I argued, yelling at him.

"Do _that_. Yell across the hall!" he said.

"Ugh! I didn't do anything wrong. _You're _the one who did something wrong!" I scowled.

He looked at me, _finally_. "What did I do wrong?"

"You! You… You're hair is too long!" I exclaimed.

Fang raised an eyebrow. "You're telling _me_, _I_ have long hair, Lissa? Shove off." And then he continued walking away.

"Wait! Fang!" I scrambled to run after him.

"_What?_" he snapped. "You're going to make me late to class." I suddenly became really self-conscious. "Time's ticking Lissa, what do you want?"

"I like you; do you like me?" I blurted.

There was a silence.

And then, _get this_, Fang started laughing hysterically. I know, it creeped me out too. When he finally calmed down, he looked me straight in the eye.

"No," he said bluntly. "Go cry in a corner and leave me alone." With that, he turned back around and flicked me off.

* * *

_**Step Three: **__When you're done expressing yourself, ASK, "So, how do you feel about me?"_

"Um, Fang."

"Hmm?"

"I think you're like, drop dead gorgeous, and totally hot. You don't smile much, but that's okay, you're emo. And you hang out with that silly girl-wannabe, Max, or whatever her name is. But I can deal with that, because you're hot, and I like you. So how do you feel about me?"

"Do you want the honest truth, or the nice lie, Lissa?"

"The one that makes me feel better!"

"I'm like, _totally_ into you, Lissa, because you're _totally_ hot and stuff."

"Really?"

"…"

"Wait, was that the honest truth, or the nice lie?"

"What do you think."

"The honest truth."

"No."

"So it was all like, a… LIE?"

"Well like, _DERR_. I like, don't like you."

* * *

_**Step Four: **__If they have nothing to say to how you feel, DON'T move on_

_Lissa: _"I _really_ like you, Fang," I said earnestly, looking directly at his face.

_Fang: _I'm just not going to answer to that.

_Lissa: _Why isn't he answering?

_Fang: _Still not going to respond…

_Lissa: _So awkward! He hasn't said anything yet!

_Fang: _Why is she still here?

_Lissa:_ Okaay, then. "Fang? Why aren't you answering?" I asked worried.

_Fang: _"I have my reasons."

_Lissa: _"Oh. Well um, do you like me? Because I really like you."

_Fang:_ Will she not leave me alone?

_Lissa: _"Fa-ang!" I sung, trying to get his attention. Suddenly, Max appeared by his side.

_Fang: _Thank you! Max is here! Her hand grip mine and she flashed a smile my way, before it turned into a glare pointed at Lissa.

_Max: _"Heey, Lissa!" I chirped, feigning happiness. "Got something to say?"

_Lissa:_ What is _she_ doing here? "Yeah, I do. What are _you_ doing here, holding my future husband's hand?" I hiss.

_Max: _Lissa's such a comedian. "Haha, you aren't serious, right? Fang's my _present_ boyfriend and lover," I reply smugly. Her mouth gapes open and her eyes twitch murderously.

_Fang:_ Holy crap, _chick fight!_

_Lissa: _She… He… What? NO! I will not let this get to me! "So Fang, do you like me?"

_Fang: _How stupid can she get?

_Max: _Oh no she didn't. Lissa's going _down._

* * *

_**Step Five: **__If they do let you know how they feel about you, but it is not the same way you feel about them, DO stress it and MAKE the mistake to take it back_

**1 New Message From: ****_Lissa_**

I think I like you.

**2 New Messages From: ****_Lissa_**

Wait, I know I like you.

**To: ****_Lissa_**

Sorry, but the feeling's not mutual.

**1 New Message From: ****_Lissa_**

OMG REALLY? I thought… OMG, OMG, OMG….

**2 New Messages From: ****_Lissa_**

… I'm so sorry! That was a umm…. Mistake! I didn't mean to send!

**3 New Messages From: ****_Lissa_**

So sorry! It was on er, accident!

**To: ****_Lissa_**

Okay. But I don't like you either way


End file.
